The Last Letter

01:18

You seem fine these days, I’m just glad I could still watch you from far away. I pretended to go home first just to see you one last time every day. I was looking at your eyes before you noticed and I turned away. And I still can’t forget you, someone who made my sky turns gray. I still remember the starry summer sky when you said goodbye, as well as the sparkle in your eyes. How I denied reality, how I ran away, I am a loser a person could become.

Every time we talk, we’re just gonna fight again and I can’t stand to bother you more. If only I can speak to you one more time, but you were gone and I just can’t think straight. So, I wrote this letter with the things that left unsaid in my head, hoping you will read it, hoping you will not care a bit.

It’s been some time since I last met you, I can’t find you anywhere. If only I can speak to you one more time, I’ll be okay. Since that day, I've been having problem sleeping. Not because I can’t fall asleep, but because I always had a dream about you every night and every morning I woke up to, I’ll be missing you.

I think I've been losing my balance ever since. Like this very afternoon, I fell in the classroom when I’m just walking. These heavy lids need some serious sleeping but I don’t want to miss you again, I don’t want to dream about you but I need to sleep. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

I hope you know I didn't want you to care, because it hurts to know how you break your promises. I just hope you still remember me and even though it is over for you, it is not for me.

a letter for you,

Andri Kurniawan