A Change of Heart
13:59
I have felt it all. Every day
feels like I’m not alive, just counting the days left for me to leave this world. Hatred, envy, pain, and sorrow... what difference it will make to show
them. A smile is never more than a face to put on, being all nice makes me sick
of it sometimes, but that’s all I can do to keep every other soul happy at
least. Well, it’s better to fake a smile all the time than to show my true feelings to everybody that will not care a bit.
It’s better if I don’t know my
parents than having a family that didn’t want me like this, it’s heavier to be
an unwanted child. Nobody will ever understand, they’re just gonna care to
what’s important for them, and I’m not precious to anybody. If somebody does
care, they should have seen it in my eyes already, but they’re just all talk
and no different.
It hurts real badly, to do
something you never agreed to do... just so you can eat for today, you can take
another breath, to keep on living a life you didn’t want to have anymore. I
never ask to be chosen, I just want to live a normal girl’s life, with just my
real mother and my sister...
I created this land, where
everyone can live evenly happy. Those who work hard will earn what they want,
nobody will be born rich nor poor. But I know it was impossible from the
beginning, this kind of life will just end up as another dream. And I end up
trapped here, inside the world that I alone have created. Crying for tears that
will not reach the earth forever.
But I know I’m not the only
dreamer. I hope someone will save me from this land I created, and sees through
my eyes that I’m not okay deep inside this smile. I am not alone. A land will
rise above hopes and dreams, where everyone can live evenly happy, not to smile
when they don’t want to. But I can’t return to the reality now, not after I
betrayed everybody when I left. I just wanted to be alone now.
a voice of a new land
song,
Luca Trulyworth
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